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The Science Fiction Podcast Magazine. Each week Escape Pod delivers science fiction short stories from today\'s best authors. Listen today, and hear the new sound of science fiction!
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EP256: The Mermaids Singing Each to Each

 40.4MB
By Cat Rambo Read by: Christiana Ellis of Nina Kimberly the Merciless and Space
Casey First appeared in Clarkesworld Discuss on our forums. All stories by Cat Rambo All
stories read by Christiana Ellis “Laura,” a speaker said, as though I
hadn’t been gone for six years, as though she’d seen me every day in between.
“Laura, where is your uncle?” I used to imagine her disintegrated, torn apart
into silent atoms. “It’s not Laura anymore,” I said. “It’s
Lolo. I’m gender neutral.” “I don’t understand,” she
said. “You’ve got a Net connection,” I said. “Search around on
“gender neutral” and “biomod operation.” I wasn’t sure if
the pause that came after that was for dramatic effect or whether she really was having
trouble understanding the search parameters. Then she said, “Ah, I see. When did you
do that?” “Six years ago.” “Where is your
uncle?” “Dead,” I said flatly. I hoped that machine intelligences could
hurt and so I twisted the knife as far as I could. “Stabbed in a bar
fight.” Rated R for violence, language, and memory of sexual violence. And Spar
feedback. Show Notes: Feedback for Episode 248, Spar Next week" Union Dues!

EP255: Variations on a Theme

 16.3MB
By William Meikle Read by: Zachary Ricks of Flying Island Press First appeared in
Wrongworld Discuss on our forums. All stories by William Meikle All stories read by
Zachary Ricks They took Johnny Green from class 3a at ten o' clock on Tuesday morning. He
was the last to go. They thought I didn't notice, but I've been onto them for a while now.
It started nearly two weeks ago. Teaching biology is difficult when you've got a teenage
audience. Almost every topic on the syllabus has something about reproduction in it, and
that reduces your typical youngster to giggles, rude jokes or hysteria. I've got used to
it over the last twenty years, and have come to expect the reactions. I've even come to
know who to expect them from. So when Jack Doyle was quiet during my "Asexual reproduction
in amoeba" spiel, I knew immediately that something was wrong. And my sense of wrongness
really went into overdrive when he stayed behind after class to ask questions. Rated PG
for asexual reproduction and giggling teens. Show Notes: Feedback for Episode 245,
Bridecicle Next week" Mermaids and scavengers.

EP254: A Talent For Vanessa

 29.4MB
By David W. Goldman Read by: Dave Thompson of PodCastle First appeared in Analog Science
Fiction and Fact Discuss on our forums. All stories by David W. Goldman All stories read
by Dave Thompson The young woman, a Ms. Vanessa Kortright-Kingston, untwisted. “No,
I mean that he just knows the date like that! As if he could look into the
future.” Marv snorted. “Calendar calculating. They all do that. Not worth a
paper dollar, not even in a carnival sideshow.” “I’ve heard of it, but
— ” Her blue eyes were wide as a con man’s smile. “They can all do
it?” “Sure.” Marv tilted back, his big wooden chair squeaking.
“All the Counters, anyway. It’s like the Artists — they all draw horses.
Or dogs. Which is funny, because back when they got their talents you’d never see a
horse here in the city. Dogs, okay, no big deal. But you ask any Artist to sketch you a
horse, and blam — if the damn thing galloped off the paper you wouldn’t be
surprised.” Her gaze went a bit distant. “That’s what I’d
like,” she said. “To become an artist. Or a musician.” Rated PG for
dreams realized. Show Notes: Feedback for Episode 246, The Bride of Frankenstein Next
week" Teaching is quite tough, admittedly.

EP253: Eugene

 17.2MB
By Jacob Sager Weinstein Read by: Tim “ShoEboX” Crist of Worm Quartet, Cirque
du So What?, and The Funny Music Project First appeared in Popcorn Fiction Discuss on our
forums. All stories by Jacob Sager Weinstein All stories read by Tim “ShoEboX”
Crist As he puts the cruiser in gear and takes off, I calm down a little bit, and smell
something that worries me. I smell Apurna on him, like always, but she doesn't smell
right. She smells of nervousness bordering on fear, and come to think of it, he does, too.
It's an old smell–I'd say from late yesterday evening, just after work–but
it's unmistakable. And there's a hospital smell, and the smell of Apurna's pain. I
shouldn't say anything. Francisco doesn't like me to pry. But he took Apurna to the
hospital. But he doesn't like me to pry. But he took Apurna to the hospital. But he
doesn't like me to pry. But– "What's wrong with Apurna?" I say. Rated PG for minor
police excitement. Show Notes: Feedback for Episode 245, The Moment Next week" Talent
agencies and regret

EP252: Billion-Dollar View

 18.1MB
By Ray Tabler Read by: John Cmar Discuss on our forums. All stories by Ray Tabler All
stories read by John Cmar “But my name is Simon.” Molly shook her head and
chuckled. “With a head of hair like that? Nope, from now on your name is
Red.” Simon felt his young face flushing with embarrassment, which would further
cement his new nickname. “What if I don’t want to be called
Red?” “Too late, should have shaved your head before I bought your
contract.” Molly winked at him, executed a back flip in mid-air and launched herself
out of the Labor Mart. “Come on, Red. We ain’t got all day.” Rated PG
for peril and heartbreak and ballads. Show Notes: Hugo award winner Cheryl Morgan
launches Wizard’s Tower Press for bringing out-of-print books to ebooks. We have
feedback for Episode 244. Promo for NK Jemisin’s Hundred Thousand Kingdoms. Next
week" A very, very good dog.

EP251: Unexpected Outcomes

 25.4MB
By Tim Pratt Read by: Tom “Devo Spice” Rockwell of The Funny Music
Project.. Discuss on our forums. Originally published in: Interzone All stories by Tim
Pratt All stories read by Tom “Devo Spice” Rockwell But the plane just
stopped, and hung there, nose tipped at a slight angle, mere feet from the building. And
that’s when the figure — the one people call the Ambassador, or the Doctor, or
the Outsider, or the Professor, or a hundred other names — appeared. Just a
middle-aged man in a white lab coat, with steel-rimmed glasses and graying hair. His image
filled the air above the jetliner, like the dome of the sky had been transformed into an
IMAX movie screen. He said, “People of Earth, I have a message for you.” Rated
PG for ennui and futility of life. Show Notes: Tim Pratt is serializing a Marla Mason
novel, Broken Mirrors at his website. His first anthology is out this summer from Night
Shade Books, Sympathy for the Devil. Tom Rockwell’s work can be found at his
personal music website, Devo Spice, The Funny Music Project, and his comedy troupe, Cirque
du So What? Incidentally, Tom Rockwell, myself, and many other Escape Artist writers and
narrators will be at NASFiC next week, so check us out if you’re in the Raleigh, NC
area! Next week" Rescue in deep space. And guitar ballads.

EP250: Eros, Philia, Agape

 54.7MB
By Rachel Swirsky Discuss on our forums. Originally published in: Tor.com All stories by
Rachel Swirsky All stories read by Mur Lafferty The objects belonged to them both, but
Adriana waved her hand bitterly when Lucian began packing. "Take whatever you want," she
said, snapping her book shut. She waited by the door, watching Lucian with sad and angry
eyes. Their daughter, Rose, followed Lucian around the house. "Are you going to take that,
Daddy? Do you want that?" Wordlessly, Lucian held her hand. He guided her up the stairs
and across the uneven floorboards where she sometimes tripped. Rose stopped by the picture
window in the master bedroom, staring past the palm fronds and swimming pools, out to the
vivid cerulean swath of the ocean. Lucian relished the hot, tender feel of Rose's hand. I
love you, he would have whispered, but he'd surrendered the ability to speak. Rated PG for
marital strife and implied child abuse. Show Notes: This is a long one, we’re
bringing occasional novelettes to Escape Pod now, and what better to launch the effort
than a Hugo nominee? Next week" Escape Pod looks at an alternate history with alternate
aliens.

EP249: Little M@tch Girl

 18.4MB
By Heather Shaw Read by Mur Lafferty Discuss on our forums. Originally published in:
Tumbarumba All stories by Heather Shaw All stories read by Mur Lafferty It wasn’t
that Em disapproved of drug use, you just had to be savvy about which drugs you took. Back
before she had to get a day job, she was a M@tch girl, much to the delight of the guys on
the club scene. M@tch wasn’t a wimpy drug, but it didn’t turn you into a
murderous street zombie either. It was also expensive — a designer “where
it’s @!” drug — that the Tweakers couldn’t afford anyway. Rated R
for one sexual scene and drug use. Show Notes: We’re back, we hope you liked our
Hugo offering! Be sure to vote before July 31! Next week" Escape Pod ventures into the
world of novellas.

EP248: Spar

 16.6MB
By Kij Johnson. Read by: Kate Baker of Clarkesworld Magazine. Discuss on our
forums. Originally published in: Clarkesworld — Download and read the text. All
stories by Kij Johnson. All stories read by Kate Baker. The alien is not humanoid. It is
not bipedal. It has cilia. It has no bones, or perhaps it does and she cannot feel them.
Its muscles, or what might be muscles, are rings and not strands. Its skin is the color of
dusk and covered with a clear thin slime that tastes of snot. It makes no sounds. She
thinks it smells like wet leaves in winter, but after a time she cannot remember that
smell, or leaves, or winter. Its Ins and Outs change. There are dark slashes and permanent
knobs that sometimes distend, but it is always growing new Outs, hollowing new Ins. It
cleaves easily in both senses. It penetrates her a thousand ways. She penetrates it, as
well. Rated X – Graphic language and sexual situations. Not for kids.
Seriously. Show Notes: This particular story and narration were originally recorded by
Kate Baker for Clarkesworld Magazine, and is used here with their expressed permission.
Thanks very much to Baker and Clarkesworld. The Escape Pod Flash Contest is over! now
check out the judging! Editor’s note: Thanks so much to Dave Thompson and Peter Wood
for taking on this project of securing all five Hugo stories during the hiatus of Escape
Pod. Most of the work was done before I joined, and this wouldn’t have happened
without them stepping up. Next week" We’re back to our regularly scheduled
programming with a story from Heather Shaw!

EP247: Bridesicle

 37.8MB
By Will McIntosh Read by: Amy H. Sturgis of StarShipSofa Discuss on our forums. Originally
published in: Asimov’s — Download and read the text Guest Host: Ben Phillips
of Pseudopod All stories by Will McIntosh All stories read by Amy H. Sturgis "Aw, I know
you're awake by now. Come on, sleeping beauty. Talk to me." The last was a whisper, a
lover's words, and Mira felt that she had to come awake and open her eyes. She tried to
sigh, but no breath came. Her eyes flew open in alarm. An old man was leaning over her,
smiling, but Mira barely saw him, because when she opened her mouth to inhale, her jaw
squealed like a sea bird's cry, and no breath came, and she wanted to press her hands to
the sides of her face, but her hands wouldn't come either. Nothing would move except her
face. Rated PG Show Notes: Starship Sofa is the first podcast ever to be nominated for a
Hugo award, in the “Best Fanzine” category. If you’re eligible to vote
in the Hugos, you have less than a month left to put in your vote! Please consider
Starship Sofa – it’s a fantastic show on its own merit, and it’s a HUGE
credibility booster for all podcasts if it wins! The Escape Pod Flash Contest ends soon!
It runs June 1- July 4, stories must be under 500 words. More information at the
link. Editor’s note: Thanks so much to Dave Thompson and Peter Wood for taking on
this project of securing all five Hugo stories during the hiatus of Escape Pod. Most of
the work was done before I joined, and this wouldn’t have happened without them
stepping up. Next week" Our final Hugo-nominated story!

EP246: Bride of Frankenstein

 27.9MB
By Mike Resnick Read by: Julie Davis of the Forgotten Classics podcast Discuss on our
forums. Originally published in: Asimov’s — Download and read the text Guest
Host: Alasdair Stuart of Pseudopod All stories by Mike Resnick All stories read by Julie
Davis Victor can be so annoying. He constantly whistles this tuneless song, and when I
complain he apologizes and then starts humming it instead. He never stands up to that
ill-mannered little hunchback that he's always sending out on errands. And he's a coward.
He can never just come to me and say "I need money again." Oh, no, not Victor. Instead he
sends that ugly little toady who's rude to me and always smells like he hasn't washed.
And when I ask what the money's for this time, he tells me to ask Victor, and Victor just
mumbles and stammers and never gets around to answering. Rated PG: for spousal
annoyances Show Notes: The Escape Pod Flash Contest ends soon! It runs June 1- July 4,
stories must be under 500 words. More information at the link. Editor’s note: Thanks
so much to Dave Thompson and Peter Wood for taking on this project of securing all five
Hugo stories during the hiatus of Escape Pod. Most of the work was done before I joined,
and this wouldn’t have happened without them stepping up. Next week" Another
Hugo-nominated story!

EP Special: Solitary as an Oyster re-record

 31.7MB
Many people have asked for the edit of one of our Christmas stories, Solitary as an
Oyster, which suffered some technical difficulty. Sadly, with all the editorial changeover
this spring, it ended up on the back burner. But now, six months from Christmas, we give
you a treat in the heat of summer (norther hemisphere, anyway): Solitary as an Oyster by
Mur Lafferty.

EP245: The Moment

 24.5MB
By Lawrence M. Schoen Read by: Graeme Dunlop Discuss on our forums. Originally published
in: Footprints Guest Host: Norm Sherman of Drabblecast All stories by Lawrence M.
Schoen All stories read by Graeme Dunlop One of the first generation of Krenn had lived
long enough to reach the site, though none had expected to. The very first Krenn had
conceived of this journey in the distant past, dedicating his life and his posterity to
the pilgrimage with an ever recycling population of clones. Like their clone-father, each
was an optimized collection of smart matter no bigger than a speck. Hundreds of
generations of Krenn had lived and died during the voyage, their remains enshrined into
niches in the very walls of the vessel that now lay shattered at its destination. The
survivors flooded out upon the steppes of the heel, rejoicing despite the crushing weight
that gravity forced upon them. They settled in, constructing mansions of haze and shadow,
and waited for enlightenment to come. The mission and purpose of the first Krenn remained
with each of them. This place had been the site of the greatest triumph of the greatest
archaeocaster in all of history. Before the beginning of the quest, Krenn--the original
Krenn--had felt drawn to it. He had cultivated the tales, sifted myth from coincidence,
mastered the lost language of the interview-eschewing, spatial curmudgeons of the ancient
dark times, and recreated the route through dimensional puzzles to this theoretical
location. The odds of success had been so absurd not a single entelechy of Krenn’s
crèche dared invest time or expense in the project. And yet, here they were, nearly three
hundred unique individuals sharing the template of Krenn. Rated PG: for Space Exploration
and Looking into the Abyss Show Notes: Enter the Escape Pod Flash Contest! It runs June
1- July 4, stories must be under 500 words. More information at the link. Editor’s
note: Thanks so much to Dave Thompson and Peter Wood for taking on this project of
securing all five Hugo stories during the hiatus of Escape Pod. Most of the work was done
before I joined, and this wouldn’t have happened without them stepping up. Next
week" Another Hugo-nominated story!

EP244: Non-Zero Probabilities

 21.6MB
By N.K. Jemisin Originally recorded by Kate Baker for Clarkesworld Magazine, and is used
here with their expressed permission. Discuss on our forums. Guest Host: Dave Thompson of
Podcastle All stories by N.K. Jemisin All stories read by Kate Baker Her neighbor -- the
other one, across the hall -- helped her figure it out, long before the math geeks
finished crunching their numbers. “Watch,” he’d said, and laid a deck of
cards facedown on her coffee table. (There was coffee in the cups, with a generous dollop
of Bailey’s. He was a nice-enough guy that Adele felt comfortable offering this.) He
shuffled it with the blurring speed of an expert, cut the deck, shuffled again, then
picked up the whole deck and spread it, still facedown. “Pick a card.” Adele
picked. The Joker. “Only two of those in the deck,” he said, then shuffled and
spread again. “Pick another.” She did, and got the other
Joker. “Coincidence,” she said. (This had been months ago, when she was still
skeptical.) Rated R: for Lucky Streaks and Getting Lucky. Show Notes: Enter the Escape
Pod Flash Contest! It runs June 1- July 4, stories must be under 500 words. More
information at the link. Editor’s note: Thanks so much to Dave Thompson and Peter
Wood for taking on this project of securing all five Hugo stories during the hiatus of
Escape Pod. Most of the work was done before I joined, and this wouldn’t have
happened without them stepping up. Next week" Another Hugo-nominated story!

EP243: I’m Alive, I Love You, I’ll See You in Reno

 23.0MB
By Vylar Kaftan Read by Mur Lafferty Discuss on our forums. Simultaneously appearing in
Lightspeed Magazine, Issue 1, June 1, 2010. All stories by Vylar Kaftan All stories read
by Mur Lafferty I knew you loved me, of course. It was written in your eyes when you
looked at me, a physics problem with no clear answer. If an irresistible force meets an
immovable object, what happens then? They meet. That's all we know. Relative to each
other, they are in contact. From within the object or the force, there is no way to tell
if you’re in motion. Rated PG-13: for sexual description. Show Notes: Thanks to
John Joseph Adams and Lightspeed Magazine for the opportunity to run this fantastic story
at the same time as their launch. Go check out their magazine and subscribe! Enter the
Escape Pod Flash Contest! It runs June 1- July 4, stories must be under 500 words. More
information at the link. Next week… we begin our annual Hugo short stories rundown,
with five weeks of award-nominated stories! I’m taking a 4-week break from hosting,
but I’ll see you in July!

EP242: The Love Quest of Smidgen the Snack Cake

 41.2MB
By Robert T. Jeschonek Read by John Cmar. Discuss on our forums. First appeared in Space
and Time Magazine, issue 108. All stories by Robert T. Jeschonek All stories read by John
Cmar For her entire adolescent and adult life up until three weeks ago, Lynda had been the
queen of junk food. Aside from the briefest blips of non-junk spending due to occasional
failed diets, she had purchased only the most fattening, high-cholesterol, chemical-soaked
foods available from grocery stores, restaurants, vending machines, and mail order
websites. In short, she was the perfect woman. Though she was on a diet that day, she had
eaten non-nutritious foods in great quantities all her life. Though her last purchases
had been salad greens and bottled water, her 250-pound body told the true story. I knew
she was just waiting for someone like me to come along. Rated PG: for innuendo-heavy snack
cake desire. Show Notes: Mur will be at Balticon this week, along with
Drabblecast’s Norm Sherman! Come by and say hi! FRIDAY 5pm Reading SATURDAY: 3pm
NaNoWriMo for Noobs 8pm Autograph Session SUNDAY 4pm Girls’ Rule Live! 5pm Story
Improv 8pm ISBW Live! Enter the Escape Pod Flash Contest! It runs June 1- July 4,
stories must be under 500 words. More information at the link. Next week… the
podcast comes on a special day: June 1. And it shows us that love is relative. And so is
Reno.

EP241: Thargus and Brian

 29.7MB
By Stephen Gaskell. Read by Chris Miller of Unquiet Desperation. Discuss on our
forums. All stories by Stephen Gaskell All stories read by Chris Miller Thargus thought
the time right. He set the lights to full strength and flailed and gnashed and roared as
he’d been practising. He felt rather silly, but the performance seemed to be
working. The human, one hand steadying its spin, looked on intensely. It moved the white
stick up to its mouth, breathed in, and then stabbed the stick out against the sac
wall. “Don’t be afraid,”  Thargus said, meaning the opposite.
He’d seen the trick on old films stored in the moss-brain when humans always said
one thing and meant another like “We’re safer if we split up.” The human
exhaled a long stream of smoke. “I’m not,” it said. That didn’t
sound right. Thargus considered his response while staring at the human. It sure was ugly.
A patchwork of dirty synthetics over the majority of its body, and on top of its pudgy,
pink head, strand upon strand of greasy hair. Ugh!  Thargus felt sick. “Be afraid,
then,” he said. “Why, are you going to eat me?” Thargus didn’t
feel comfortable telling an outright lie, but that didn’t mean he needed to be too
honest. “I might.” Rated F: for two f-bombs and some serious munchies. Show
Notes: We’re now on Twitter! Follow us @escapepodcast Enter the Escape Pod Flash
Contest! It runs June 1- July 4, stories must be under 500 words. More information at the
link. Next week… we discover that food is, in fact, love.

EP240: The Last McDougal’s

 22.6MB
By David D. Levine. Read by Stephen Eley. Discuss on our forums. First appeared in
Asimov’s, January 2006. Special closing song: “Blue,” by Yoko Kanno. As
the old man came in, letting the door close gently behind him, an expression came over his
face that Garth had seen many times before: a compound of misty nostalgia and appalled
astonishment. His gaze swept across the yellow and orange fiberglass chairs, their cracks
and dings lovingly but visibly repaired; the plastic-topped tables with the white
half-moons rubbed by millions of elbows; the light softly shining from the satiny steel of
the napkin and catsup dispensers. Finally the old man’s eyes stopped dead on the
smiling face of the six-foot-tall fiberglass cow that stood at the end of the counter,
wearing an apron and a chef’s hat. “My God,” he said, “it’s
Moogle McDougal.” “It certainly is,” said Garth. “Welcome to
McDougal’s. May I take your order?” “Give me a minute,” he
replied as he perused the menu. He had a comfortable old boot of a voice, rough but
mellow. “It’s been… jeez, thirty years? …since I’ve been in
one of these places. Um, I’ll have a double cheeseburger, a small order of fries,
and….” He grinned. “…and a shake. Chocolate.” Rated PG.
Contains some violence and is high in saturated fats.

EP Metacast 5

 4.7MB
Steve discusses the downtime and announces the new editor of Escape Pod.

EP239: A Programmatic Approach to Perfect Happiness

 19.8MB
By Tim Pratt. Read by Stephen Eley. First appeared in Futurismic, April 2009. Opening
poem: “Scientific Romance” Audible.com Promotion! Get your free audiobook at:
http://audible.com/escapepodsff My step-daughter Wynter, who is regrettably prejudiced
against robots and those who love us, comes floating through the door in a metaphorical
cloud of glitter instead of her customary figurative cloud of gloom. She enters the
kitchen, rises up on the toes of her black spike-heeled boots, wraps her
leather-braceleted arms around my neck, and places a kiss on my cheek, leaving behind a
smear of black lipstick on my artificial skin and a whiff of white make-up in
my artificial nose. "Hi Kirby," she says, voice all bubbles and light, when normally she
would never deign to utter my personal designation. "Is Moms around? Haven't talked to her
in a million." I know right away that Wynter has been infected. Rated R. Contains mature
sexual situations and adult themes. (And robot themes.)

EP238: Wind From a Dying Star

 31.0MB
By David D. Levine. Read by Meg Westfox. First appeared in Bones of the World, ed. Bruce
Holland Rogers. After a time she found a small patch of zeren. She spread across it,
taking a little solace from its sparkling sweetness. “Zero-point energy” was
what Old John called it, but to Gunai and the rest of her tribe it was zeren, delicious
and rare. Gunai recalled a time when zeren was something you could almost ignore —
a constant crackling thrum beneath the surface of perception — but now there were
just a few thin patches here and there. These days the tribe subsisted mostly on a thin
diet of starlight, and even that was growing cold. Soon they would be forced to move on
again. Yeoshi had told her the foraging was better in the direction of the galactic core,
but it was so far… Rated PG. Contains sacrifice and space battles. Of a sort.

EP237: Roadside Rescue

 0.0MB
By Pat Cadigan. Read by Stephen Eley. First appeared in Omni, July 1985. "That's a long
time to wait." The navigator's smile widened. He was very attractive, holo-star kind of
handsome. People who work for aliens, Etan thought. "Perhaps you'd care to wait in my
employer's transport. For that matter, I can probably repair your vehicle, which will save
you time and money. Roadside rescue fees are exorbitant." "That's very kind," Etan said,
"but I have called, and I don't want to impose--" "It was my employer's idea to stop, sir.
I agreed, of course. My employer is quite fond of people. In fact, my employer loves
people. And I'm sure you would be rewarded in some way." Rated R. Contains profanity and
mature (if alien) themes.

EP236: Still On the Road

 8.0MB
By Geoffrey A. Landis. Read by Stephen Eley. First appeared in Asimov’s, December
2008. Turns out, you know, that old dharma bum never made it off the wheel of karma. He
had too many attachments, to the road, to words; and if you love the things of the world
of Mara too much you fall back into the world, like gravity pulling back a rocket that
doesn't reach escape velocity. Two, three thousand years later, he’s still on the
road. Really, nothing’s changed. And Neal, that old prankster, Neal never really
did want to transcend, he loved to see it all streaming past the window, a constant moving
circus disappearing in the rear-view mirror, loved to talk, loved it all. Rated PG.
Contains a little profanity and a lot of beat.

EP235: On the Human Plan

 21.3MB
By Jay Lake. Read by Mike Boris (of Mike Boris Audio). First appeared in Lone Star
Stories, February 2009. I am called Dog the Digger. I am not mighty, neither am I
fearsome. Should you require bravos, there are muscle-boys aplenty among the rat-bars of
any lowtown on this raddled world. If it is a wizard you want, follow the powder-trails
of crushed silicon and wolf’s blood to their dark and winking lairs. Scholars can
be found in their libraries, taikonauts in their launch bunkers and ship foundries,
priests amid the tallow-gleaming depths of their bone-ribbed cathedrals. What I do is dig.
For bodies, for treasure, for the rust-pocked hulks of history, for the sheer pleasure of
moving what cannot be moved and finding what rots beneath. You may hire me for an
afternoon or a month or the entire turning of the year. It makes me no mind
whatsoever. As for you, I know what you want. You want a story. Rated PG. Contains
entropy and age. A lot of it.

EP234: The Secret Protocols of the Elders of Zion

 32.9MB
By Lavie Tidhar. Read by Stephen Eley. First appeared in The West Pier Gazette &
Other Stories, 2008. It was afternoon, after school has ended for the day. Sash has been
working in the hydroponics gardens, helping the adults with the delicate work of picking
the buds. It was flowering time, and the ganja plants were at the end of their cycle. It
was then, with her hands sticky with resin and her skin tingling pleasantly from the work
and the heat, with Mama Kingston's deep, melodious voice saying 'a good harvest, child, a
good harvest' with a throaty chuckle, when Sash felt about herself the presence of Jah in
everything she did and was profoundly happy: it was then that Sash discovered, for the
first time, the existence of the Secret. Rated R. Contains some violence and a plot
heavily focused on drug use. If you’re good with that, there’s not much else
likely to be problematic for younger audiences.
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